Long Time, No Blog

I have really been slacking on here. I have had SO MUCH going on.

Where do I start….?
I’m just going to say it plainly and simply for the purposes of getting it off my chest and moving past it. My husband and I separated and I left the home we shared on August 10th with our two little boys. I’ve since moved in with family who are helping me until I can get on my feet. I am working really hard trying to find a late night/overnight job so I can still be at home to raise my kids. I’m also trying to get through school as quickly as possible so I can get my personal trainer certification and start my career. It’s extremely difficult and scary being on my own, but I am happy about the decision I’ve made for myself and my kids and I am looking forward to learning and growing from this experience.

So, that’s what I’ve been up to. Lots of stress, tears, and heartache. It’s been a long, hard 6 weeks and my new healthy lifestyle has suffered as a result. I haven’t worked out as much as I could or should and my eating has been….not so great. Well, I can’t afford my own food right now, not the way I was eating when my eating was perfect, lol, so I’m doing the best I can with what my family buys. They are vegetarian and eat a lot of healthy food. The only problem is I need the protein from the meat (I get meat here and there) and they eat a lot of carbs, which I shouldn’t be eating. As you can see, my eating plan has been a little off.

But the one thing I am so so proud of myself for is I have gotten my portion sizes right and I haven’t strayed from that. I can’t even remember the last time I had seconds of anything and that is big for me. I can still remember getting seconds and sometimes thirds at dinner. Now, I feel satisfied after just one plate and I honestly don’t even think about getting another helping. I never thought I’d be able to get my portion sizes under control either, but I have, and after only 4 months of this lifestyle change. That is a big Non-Scale Victory for me! I know I’ll “slip up” in the future, we all do, but I am so happy to have reached this one little milestone.

Another thing I wanted to do was just sum up my challenge goals really quick. I am in two weight loss challenges at the moment. The first one started July 8th and ends October 7th with my goal being to lose 40 lbs. in that time and fit into size 18 pants and an XL shirt. So far, I am down 24 lbs. and not sure of the sizes. My pants are really loose but we’ll see! The second one just started September 6th and ends the same day as the first. The goal is for everyone to lose 5% of their weight which for me is 13.5 lbs. I forgot to choose rewards for this round, but since I missed my goal last time, I’ll just extend that reward to these challenges. A manicure for my 5% challenge and a pedicure if I lose those 40 lbs. Mani/Pedi here I come!!


Insanity Complete!!

Oh my gosh! I finished something!
I have had a really rough 2 months, with lots of drama, stress, and personal/family matters going on. As much as I enjoyed this program and the way it’s made me feel physically and mentally, it’s been really hard to stick to it. I’ve had a lot of ups and downs when it comes to getting my workouts in. And these last 2 weeks I’ve had a hard time eating the way I was in the beginning. I’ve disappointed myself a few times for sure, but I am incredibly proud that I didn’t quit. I kept going.

My goal was to lose 30 lbs. in these 2 months on Insanity. I didn’t meet my goal. I lost 25 lbs. Not as good as I could’ve done and I know that. I let my emotions get the best of me recently and slacked a lot. But, 25 lbs. is 25 lbs. I’m happy about it! And I know that I can do better next time. There’s room for improvement for sure and I will improve if that’s what I want to do and if that’s what I work for. I am super proud of myself for completing this program. Although I didn’t do as well as I thought I could or would, I stuck it out and finished. And I’m not stopping anytime soon. =D

Pictures first: I can definitely see a difference, and in 2 months I’ll see more of a difference, and so on and so on. I’ll never quit taking care of myself again.

NEW Day 1 and 60 (1)

NEW Day 1 and 60 (2)

NEW Day 1 and 60 (3)

Day 1:
Weight – 297
Pant Size – 24
Shirt Size – 3x
Waist – 51
Hips – 54
Chest – 47
Arms – 15
Thighs – 30

Body Mass Index – 40.3
Body Fat – 58%

Day 60:
Weight – 272
Pant Size -22
Shirt Size – 1x/2x
Waist – 48
Hips – 51.5
Chest – 45
Arms – 14
Thighs – 28

Body Mass Index – 36.9
Body Fat – 55%

T-Minus 13 Days!

Wow, less than 2 weeks left until I finish my first round of Insanity! Already?

So, first things first, I missed my weigh-in on here last week because my older son was sick, then my husband, then me. Ugh. It was bad. I did actually weigh-in though, just had no time to post it, and I lost 7 lbs.! (Down to 283!) Insanity Month 2 is a killer!! But it was fun. I like how challenging it is. Even though I still cry during every workout for one reason or another. Sometimes because I’m overwhelmed, sometimes because I’m frustrated, and sometimes because I’m proud of myself. These workouts alone are helping me learn so much about myself and also shape myself into the person that I want to be, not only physically but mentally as well. It’s like they’re magic! Lol.

So, after that huge weight loss, my family did get sick and I was either too busy taking care of them or too sick myself to do hardly any workouts last week. And the ones I managed to start, I didn’t end up finishing. Yeah, it was really bad. I kept up with my healthy eating as best I could, but I had some not so good soup and grilled cheese a couple of times and things like that. I also didn’t eat as often as I normally do. I went from eating 5-6 small meals to eating 3-4 depending on how I felt that day. Hopefully I’ll be more prepared next time we all get sick with some easy snacks and recipes. (Blog post idea? Lol.)

So, as you can see, I was worried about my weigh-in yesterday. It’s been a rough week and while I wasn’t expecting a gain, I wasn’t expecting another big number either. I was pleasantly surprised when I got on the scale and lost another 5 lbs.! (Down to 278!) So, I’m down 19 lbs. in 50 days with Insanity and 33 lbs. overall in less than 3 months! I’m beyond excited about these numbers! I’m feeling a little better this week and looking forward to really busting it out these next two weeks! I can see the finish line for this round and I am SO excited to see my results from Day 1 to Day 60, especially from my before and after pictures! This is it, I’m almost there!! If I lose another 11 lbs. by the end of this, I can treat myself to that mani/pedi! Wish me luck, I could really use this reward. Lol.

We Are Warriors!

I may have a lot to work for but also a lot to be proud of. I am now on day 39 of Insanity. Wow. I’ve never kept up a workout for this long before! I love the workouts, I really do. I hate them because they hurt, but they hurt so good. I can feel myself getting stronger. I love it. It’s such an amazing feeling. I’m still really overweight, but I feel stronger. I can feel my muscles working now. Who knew I even had muscles underneath all this fat. I know there are abs in there somewhere because they hurt. Lol. I am feeling really sore all over again after having an almost non-existent workout week last week. I hurt all over. Yesterday was a lot of squats and leg work so it hurts to sit down and stand up. But I’m still loving it. I am seeing a difference in my performance and it just tells me that I will reach my goal and I will be able to do all the moves that they do in the video. Eventually.

blog111Another thing I love about Insanity? The trainer. Shaun T is AMAZING! He really kicks my butt every day. Those moments where he gets in your face and says, “Push. Keep Going. You got this. Dig deeper!” I really do kick it into high gear and bust it out as best I can! Don’t get me wrong, most of the workout, especially the moves I can’t do and now that I’m in month 2, I hate him. I curse at him through the screen. But when I’m done, after I’ve realized I can do it (or at least I’ll be able to soon) I LOVE him. He is so incredibly motivating!

This program might not be right for everyone, but it’s definitely right for me. It’ just what I need to get me to where I want to be; 50 lbs. lighter by Oct. 7th. That’s my goal date. By then, I will have finished 2 rounds of Insanity. I plan to be a size 18 pants and XL shirt. I think I was 15 the last time I fit into 18s. I have a goal outfit I need to buy to make it official, but that’s the goal! I know if I push myself that I CAN do it.


So can you. You’ve got this! If you commit and stick with it, day in and day out, there’s no way you’ll ever fail! There are always bumps in the road. There are always setbacks. But the only way you fail is by giving up. Don’t give up! I can do it. You can do it. We can do this together! I am here to support you and hopefully motivate and inspire you to keep going! You are a strong! You are a WARRIOR!!


Another Week, Another Weigh-In

Well, this week has been a tough one. Visiting family while trying to eat right is hard. We went to visit my in-laws and ended up going to a block party with tons of food. I found some healthy things, but as my husband sat down next to me with a plate full of stuffed jalapenos, cookies, and cake, I found myself eating a few bites from his plate! Fail. We went straight from the party back to their house and ate dinner. (I did not need to eat any more.) We had to eat fast so I scarfed down a veggie burger, a baked potato, carrots, corn on the cob, and some potato salad. WHAT?! Right after I finished my plate, I was completely disappointed with myself. I just had to keep telling myself that it was only one meal (one BIG meal) and that the next day would be better. Also, I got 2 hours of cardio in the pool that day so that helped a little as well. We were supposed to leave the next morning but there was a change of plans and we stayed for another day and a half. And no, I didn’t bring Insanity with me. We went to the beach the next morning and I got an amazing workout in the ocean (trying not to get pulled in, lol) and on the shore, chasing my dog around with my son. It was a exhausting but such a blast! And I ate as well as I could with what I had. The real problem is that when I’m out and about or hanging out with people, I forget to eat! Ugh. Lessons learned I hope.

Which brings me to the weigh-in. Yeah, not so good this week. I screwed up with food and my workouts this week and ended up gaining 3 lbs. Yep, I’m back up to 290 lbs. I’m so ashamed. I know that I have people who are looking to me to inspire them and motivate them and I feel like I’ve let all of you down this week. I’m sorry to you and to myself for doing this again.

This is a daily struggle. I have an addiction to food. It’s real. And it’s hard to get past it. It’s the same as having any other kind of addiction; alcohol, drugs, etc. To me, an eating addiction is worse. You can rid your house of alcohol and drugs, but we all have to eat. My addiction stares me in the face every day. I keep wondering when I’ll stop having these setbacks. Every time I mess up I feel guilty, ashamed, and disappointed. All I want to do is curl into a little ball and cry. But I found something on facebook that my coach posted and it made me feel so much better so I’d love to share it with you.


But, since I’m halfway through Insanity (only 4 weeks left!) and I’ve seen some changes other than on the scale, I thought I’d post some more during pictures. These are my 30 day results with Insanity:

before1during day 30

before 2during day 30 (2)

before 3during day 30 (3)

Weight – 290 (7 lbs. down)

Pant Size – 22 (down 2 pant sizes)

Shirt Size – 2x (down 1 shirt size)

Waist – 50 (down 1 inch)

Hips – 52 (down 2 inches)

Chest – 45 (down 2 inches)

Arms – 14.5 (down .5 inch)

Thighs – 29 (down 1 inch)

Body Mass Index – 49.3 (down 1 point)

Body Fat – 57% (down 1%)

And there you have it. Progress! I have 4 weeks left until Insanity, which means to meat my original goal for the program, I need to lose another 23 lbs. which seems crazy! I also joine another challenge group. This one is 90 days so finishing this round of Insanity and finishing another round as well. My goal for that is to lose 40 lbs., fit into a size 18 pants and an XL shirt. Wish me luck??

Have A Healthy Independence Day

Since it’s a few days before the 4th of July, I though I’d share some of the healthy recipes I’ve found for the holiday! Clean eaters can enjoy the fireworks too! =D

Of course, grill your lean meats and veggies on the barbeque! Kebabs are my favorite. Easy, fun, and you can toss on a little meat and tons of veggies!











strawberry cheesecake


Not your usual 4th of July meal, but looks delicious none the less:



There we have it! And here are a few tips on making sure you keep your independence day healthy:

1. Use Small Plates

Using small plates tricks your mind into thinking you’re eating more than you really are!

2. Eat The Healthiest Foods First

Try and fill up mostly on the veggies and lean meats, that way you’ll eat les of the sugary fruits and desserts.

3. Hydrate!

Drink a lot of water throughout the day. Not only is it going to be hot outside, but the drinking water helps to keep you full.

4. Write It Down

Keep your food journal (or a pen and paper) with you and write down what you eat. It will help keep you accountable!

5. Eat before you go

If you’re not throwing the party and making the food, eating before you go will keep you from wanting to eat some of those unhealthy options.

6. Most of all, get out there, be active, and enjoy the day!

Go for a swim or even just take a walk with family and friends!

Weigh-In – Two Months In!

I weighed myself this morning about 5 times because I couldn’t believe what I was seeing! I even had my husband come make sure I wasn’t going crazy. It says I weigh 287! That means I’ve lost 5 lbs. this week! It also mean I’ve lost 10 lbs. in the last 4 weeks, since I started Insanity, and 24 lbs. in the last 2 months! I am truly in shock right now!

This week hasn’t been he best, either so I’m surprised. I usually don’t see results for a week, so these are the results from all my hard work last week. I am not expecting a big number next weigh-in because this week has been really hard. I haven’t worked out since last Monday because I was sick all week. Maybe TMI, but it’s that time of the month and I’ve always had horrible cramps. And all I was to eat is soup, grilled cheese, and brownies. Lol. I had about 1 of each all week so I’m proud of that. I was so tempted to just give up on healthy eating all week. The only real exercise I got in was about a 1.5 mile hike with my hubby and kids yesterday. I was holding my 2 month old in his carrier half the time so that was an extra 17 lbs. or so. We were supposed to do the whole 5 mile hike, but we got lost on the way and it was going to get dark soon. No way was I dong that hike with drops on the sides of the trail with my kids at night! Maybe we’ll try it again next Sunday.

I had a few days when I was so discouraged because I wasn’t working out, too. Not only was I hurting, but I also get depressed sometimes so I was battling that this week too. I’m sure I could’ve pushed through and worked out a few times at least, but I just couldn’t get my body to get off the couch like my mind wanted it to. Oh well. That’s in the past now. I will have to try and find some healthier recipes for my TOM cravings next month and find some easier workouts if it comes to that. But that’s all I’m going to say about it. No dwelling on my little mistakes or setbacks. I know better for this week and am excited to get back on track!

Actually, I plan on coming back with a vengeance! My plan this month is to not only conquer Insanity but also to complete this July challenge from https://www.facebook.com/4fitmommas. Who’s with me??

JulyChallengeHere’s to turning my setback into a comeback!! =D